Nov. 7, 2011

It's the start of my third week today.  This weekend my daughter and I went grocery shopping which is something we desperately needed to do.  I had my shopping list ready with a lot of help from my trainer.  Over $300 later we arrived home with my daughter saying, boy it sure costs a lot to eat right.  I thought about what she said because that is what my late husband always complained about.  I've thought about this all week end and this is what I think.  No it isn't  When I went back through the reciept there was also household products included on the reciept.  But as far as food goes I started adding up reciepts that I have in my purse for fast food places that we have gone to in the past months.  The total was upsetting I live on a very limited budget and wish I had all that money we've wasted going out.  It could have bought a lot of really good groceries many times over. It was an eye opener especially to my young daughter.  But it was faster and easier to go out.  Tonight we cooked a real nice chicken dinner, while the chicken was cooking I had the veggies in the microwave in the steam bags (if you've never used them their great) By the time the chicken breasts had cooked, the veggies were done and we ate.  I think in all it took 10-15 Min.  Thats as long as going through take out.
At my training session today I had another melt down.  We started to do the boxing workout, which I really like, And we had done some walking laps, in between the curcuits, and I lost it.  It seemed harder than on the first day.  Why isn't it getting easier, why am I the weird one.  So my sweet trainer turned into a shrink, and helped me work out my feelings.  It's so easy to let my mind take over, with old habits, ways of thinking, negativity.  I hate that I let it happen.  When will the strength I need come, to get a different mind set, and be physically able to do all of this.  LIFE STYLE CHANGE, it's going to be a long journey!