Accountablity & Concequences these are words that have been thrown at me this week. They are words we use with our children (teenagers) a lot. As children we want them to grow up to be responsible adults. As adults we want to be responsible. But sometimes we make mistakes and when called on it throw tantrams like our children. I don't know about you but I have done this all my life. I have never I quess been accountable for my actions. If I wanted to eat I did, if I wanted to sit I did, If I wanted to believe I couldn't do something, I didn't do it. Now I'm thrown into a situation where it doesn't matter if I think I can succeed, there are people that do believe and they aren't listening to the excuses or the I can't, they just expect me to do it. I might not do it up to my specifications but I'm doing it. The excuses are there, I let life in general take me over, but the consequences to this is I'm going to lose this opportunity, and that's just not going to happen. So kick my big fat butt, lose the life excuses and get the fire back that I had 4 months ago when I started.
When my mother lectured for weight watchers when I was little, I remember her talking to her clients when they got discouraged or nonchalaunt about doing the food plan, and would find themselves cheating as they use to call it, or kind of spinning their wheels. The advice she gave them is go Back to The Basics!
Go back to writing everything down, go back to measureing, excersizing, etc. Someone told me the other day that this is my job. I also had someone ask me if when my son got home was I going to quit coming. Well the answer to both of those questions is yes this is like a job. You have certain hours you work, there's always planning and exicuting your work ability, But NO, heck NO am I going to stop this when my son comes home. Even though I have my days I struggle, I am not going to give this up, I do realize the difference it's made in these last 4 months, and I hope it eventually will become an everyday thing. When they say it's a lifestyle change they are correct. Having delt with my husband, and his illness no I don't want to be buried I want to LIVE and sometimes it BULL S*&?^&(* (SORRY I couldn't help myself) this is a private joke with some of the women in the pool that are reading the blog. They said I should use these words, because sometimes it's just how we feel. It's hard to change, and make the time for all this stuff, and sometimes the feelings come back to haunt you thats it just to hard. Then we get done with the water class and we're glad we all came.
I appreciate again the many people at the gym that's rooting me on, you'll never know how your words of encouragement help me. But on the other hand this is about the time where I get complacent, because if I think I'm starting to do good or look good, then those stupid voices take over saying your doing so good you don't need this, or you can skip a couple of days, or go ahead and have a gut bomb it won't hurt you. I don't know if this is called pride or whatever, but it really is a pain in the butt. Because this is when I start to falter. So please tell me I'm doing great, but put that," but you can still do so much better" in there. This way I won't get a big head!
I weigh on Thursday I really hope I 'll be out of the 400's, but I have struggled this month so who knows.
I hope you have a great week, and stay on the journey!
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